next year's big mission

Diving (with tanks, oxygen masks, with fins) is one of my to do list here in NZ.

and to get a registered diving license was one that I was suppose to get before

I return to Malaysia. If neither of that applies, I targeted for at least a

swimming surviving certificate that will qualify me to teach young children

swimming. Now, it's less than 2 weeks before going back home.

n neither of that did I achieve.

So,

I failed, BIG TIME.

*pats at the back*.

It always gives me wings (not) butterflies

Exam fever

and yeah,

happy birthday Nina.

my vote still goes to you

kerajaan membelanjakan RM8082

untuk tiket penerbangan MAS MH130 (AKL-KL) saya ke tanah air.

terima kasih (tax payers).

the baloon in your hand

Sometimes I can still see it in your eyes.

The imprint.

I'm sorry.

nocturnal being

walking barefoot in Queens St

Dinner at 1am,

sleep at 6am,

breakfast at 11am,

lunch at 6pm.

and yes,

eye bags around.

spring swings

St Heliers Primary, 2008

from strangers to buddies

I'm figuring out LiveJournal.

No. I'm not moving there.

There's this one favourite blogger of mine moved there,

and whathefish of course I had to open an account to be able to read.

kshdrmr.livejournal.com

kisahdreamer.tumblr.com

All taken babe.

To you,

I had waited ages for your updated blogspot post

and whathefish I didn't know that you transferred

all those power to a whole new realm. hah.

Bye folks, a lot of catching up to do.

Here's to zero gravity

I could have died so many times,

and been resurrected again and again

to have not learned from the countless repeated same old mistake.

That mistake is procrastination.

I spew random

the shoes that I wear everywhere

I can't stop my mouth from criticizing sometimes. I know the bf sometimes just want to shove a cookie into my mouth to make me stop commenting when watching TV3 dramaS online.

Poor movies, dramas, and series. Most of the time it happens when watching Malay ones. Malay ones sometimes could be so unrealistic. No, I don't complain about inadequate pom pom pom special effects and compare it to the ones in Hollywood. NO. It's the minor little things. Bad-written scripts, poor detailing, poor research, bad camera position, unsuitable background music. Well, of course they are some that are good.

But really.

What's up with the bad-written script?

Tower 13 scripts makes me laugh.

yeah, it supposed to be a ghost story.

kaching blingblingbling

It was 3 years ago when I went to a chinese palm reader. I was seeking nothing serious but merely for fun. It amazes me, sometimes, discovering what they will read for me. The old man, took a magnifier to analyze my palm. He looked at the lines, slapped my palm once. He said many things but many that I could hardly even remember. I shouldn't be working in the business world, but I attract wealth and luck ions, he said.

Hell yeah I want my RM30 if that doesn't happen old man.

__________________________________________

I'm not in the blurry of the religious part here. Writing for a little bit dramatic.

of farts and chatters in empty voices

Social gatherings / events /rendezvous sometimes suffocates me. I don't really like to be in a room full of people, or having too many accompanies all at the same time. I don't really enjoy loud voices, small chit chats, loud musics, and (too much) overwhelming crap talks that I don't know how to respond to. It makes me mentally and emotionally exhausted. And somehow, it will make me feel less. Sometimes, I'll be more confused than I was before.

I find it tiring to keep up with the social appearances (at times) and the way of that you should keep updated with whatever going on around you. It's easier keeping life simple, and only maintain with whatever and whoever that you choose to. Hell yeah it's way easier when you don't have too many to attend to. Life is never really tragic. But sometimes, you let it be.

Just because you crave to feel beyond norm. NO?

Such a bless to have experienced living with two understanding people like princessfad and suzehanna who understand how I function. These are the people who could tolerate my lack of utterances and constant disappearance/ absence without affecting any little bit of our friendship definition. and also the ones that makes me feel comfortable even in our distant space and silence.

Sans drama.

Retire to my cocoon.

save the cheerleader, save the world. heh

Je pense que la vie est...

It was not until 4 years ago that most of the time, people speak English in my dreams. It's not surprising when you speak one or two English sentences with Malay rojak blend in distant dream, but conversing in English throughout the dream is utterly terrifying. The first time when that happen, I txted ummi saying "now I dream in English".

Now that it's been nearly 4 years "bergelumang" with the English language whatnots, it further develop my dream ability to now see prints in English. Like the signs of toilets "men" or "women", or when I read letters in my dreams which are written in English.

I'm waiting when I'll start dreaming in French.

How Do I turn my computer off?

Click on start.

it gives me a kind of peace

shusshh it. flush it.

please.

I just want to sit back and relax.

and enjoy the ticks of life playing catch me if you can.

Love and jokes around

haywire, 2008. kisahdreamer

Have I started packing yet? NOT.

We're due to ship our stuffs back on the 9th. But I'm just too melancholic to stuff up my things in the box as by then my room will be empty. I have a quite spacious room here in Auckland hence empty means empty with 2 times emphasis. Such a clingy. Exam is like another 9 days, and I'm quite terrified, but I'm still fitting in Restaurant City (the only reason why I didn't delete facebook) every now and then.

I'm no longer addicted to lemon marmalade on multigrain bread anymore. Now it's sushi and Vanilla Soy Milk. The world sometimes could be too overwhelming.

tak ada kaitan.

macam lawat blog orang

I visit my blog every now and then.

Tak tahu kenapa.

It's like I'm waiting for someone else to update it.

pre occupied right now.

+study mode+

Auckland I heart you

the view from my window. mission bay

dari meja editor. auckland sky tower

Cape Reinga. Sand Dune


Takapuna Beach. picnic during summer

Chocolate and Caramel waffle. University pathway

I'm returning home to Malaysia on the 3rd Dec. Tak lama saja lagi. I'm sad already.

I love NZ, just like my second home. and I won't hesitate if I want to move here one day. It is a good retiring place.

Last Thursday, we've started to sign for university graduation certificate. Not so long, before graduation. I think I'll come here for graduation on Spring 2011. There is a lot of things that I like about NZ compared to Malaysia. The weather, the people, the uber great service for anything. You can just complain about a broken pipe, and they would come and fix it tomorrow. Or you can complain about your internet connection, and they would send someone right away. I love that everyone is so friendly, and they say "HI" , "excuse me" "please" and "thank you" all the time. I started to practice that more in Malaysia last December when I went back home. We should offer "thank you" more to people around us. The bus driver, the taxi driver, the waiter, the cashier, the porter, the cleaner or anyone. In NZ, everytime you get off the bus, there is always someone who would shout "thank you driver!". Trust me you'll make their day.

I love the weather. Eventhough that we can have all four seasons in a day, I still prefer this weather than the hot humid weather in Malaysia. You can walk for hours, and you can still have your make up on. I hate it when it get al sweaty walking in Malaysia. and also I don't like those rempit stares you get from the guys at the street, or mall, or wherever. diorang suka tengok orang. pffttttt!

my work station. blue day


winter in Wellington. Wellington Botanic Garden

I also love the super duper fast broadband internet that I never can experience in Malaysia. I even had the "Maxis broadband" unlimited back home last december, and I was like complaining "apsal lambat sangat ni" again and again. I guess I'm just too pampered with the fast connection here. I also love the University. If I could further my studies, I would want to experience it somewhere else. UK maybe, I wish.

I learned a lot here. soon this chapter will be over.

and start the new cycle next year.

luas pemandangan

Destinasi pelancongan aku lepas ni ada 2. India dan Jepun.

Aku nak kumpul duit lah ni nak pergi berjalan. Izz ada kat India, and Allie ada kat Jepun. Boleh tidur tempat korang. Teringin nak pergi tengok Taj Mahal. kemudian, nak naik train macam dalam cerita hindustan atau Darjeeling.

Tahniah kepada diri sendiri kerana aku dah tak shopping macam dulu dan lebih berwawasan untuk simpan duit melancong atau membeli gadget. Tahun lepas beli 5 pasang kasut yang aku tak pakai sangat. tahun ni ada 2 saja. 2 saja yang sungguh memuaskan hati. 1 kasut pegi kelas. 1 kasut event. Jadi anda akan melihat saya memakai kasut yang sama ke kelas setiap hari. Tapi mari lihat berapa lama boleh bertahan. (O_o)

There's more to life than paying for garments.

(If only I learnt this 4 years ago, then I'll be rich now)

Tahun ini juga aku tak pergi potong rambut kat saloon, langsung. tapi, the bf tolong potongkan every 3 months. he's my hairdresser now. It is him who cuts my blunt fringe, and also makes my hair feel better. and I cut his hair too. tapi selalu aku potong senget.

I think I'm having fun living only with the basics now.

zarah.

The more you know, the more you realize how little you know

(20:25-35)

the puppet

making you feel good.

heh?

imagine

I always imagine how it would be life without any social networking sites. People rely too much on these nowadays and also tweets everything they do now.

Connected yet disconnected. NO?

How I Met Your MOther Season 5

I'm happy again.

fried

breakfast : coffee, with plain crackers.

lunch: an apple, marmalade on toast, eggs, tea.

dinner: tea with plain crackers or whatever I can find in the house.

no. staying overseas is not always fun when you have to cook everytime you are hungry, or you have to at least spend $10 (RM24) for a decent Halal meal in Auckland.

the last time I ate rice was last Sunday.

I'm damn hungry now.

and just too lazy to cook.

______________________________________

Before moving to blogspot, I had a blog with friendster. After a year, I deleted that friendster blog, and moved to blogspot. I started by just having a blogspot account, and read other ppl's blog. Nothing serious.

Soon, I started to blog quite often.

Now I'm thinking of quitting blogging.

Drops of Jupiter by Train

Now that she's back in the atmosphere

With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey

She acts like summer and walks like rain

Reminds me that there's time to change, hey, hey

Since the return from her stay on the moon

She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey

Tell me did you sail across the sun

Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded

And that heaven is overrated

Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star

One without a permanent scar

And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Now that she's back from that soul vacation

Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, hey

She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo

Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey, hey

Now that she's back in the atmosphere

I'm afraid that she might think of me as plain ol' Jane

Told a story about a man who is too afraid to fly so he never did land

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet

Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day

And head back to the Milky Way

And tell me, did Venus blow your mind

Was it everything you wanted to find

And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken

Your best friend always sticking up for you even when I know you're wrong

Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone conversation

The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet

Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day

And head back toward the Milky Way

If had anything my English teacher has taught me. I would say it was the song "Drops of Jupiter" by Train.

It is the most sad song I've ever heard of. and it was like love at 1st sight. It's like I could really feel what the singer is trying to convey, and how he feels about the girl. It is about a boy and a girl at one point were very close together, and one day, the girl went away in the pursuit of finding her self.

Everytime I heard that song, I would visual how my version of the video clip would be like.

A boy sitting on a bench overlooking the city lights at night, under the stars. followed by footage of the girl's life at another foreign place, smiling, happy, dancing, when actually down in her heart there's a deep sense of sadness that remains hidden. She cries TO bed every night. She veiled her sadness with false hopes to search for the meaning of life, and happiness in a different place. but actually she fails to see that everything she needed and wanted was just right there in front of her eyes. When she returned home, the boy saw that the girl she used to know had changed with "a new atmosphere". "She listens like spring and she talks like June, and have drops of jupiter on her hair". She talks about what she did and what she had learned, entirely that is out of the boy's league. The boy started to feel small, and inferior, like almost talking to a stranger that he can no longer relate too. Then, he asked all these rhetorical question to her.

But tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet?

Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day And head back to the Milky Way? And tell me, did Venus blow your mind? Was it everything you wanted to find? And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?  Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken Your best friend always stickin' up for you even when I know you're wrong? Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance five-hour phone  conversation? The best soy latte that you ever had . . . and me 

It is like he's saying, "Yeah, I see that you've done all of these wonderful things, and I'm sure they make you feel like you are more important than everyone else here, but did any of them actually make you happy?"

________________________________________________________

This song was written on 2001, and won the Grammy Awards for the Best Rock Song.

Yoga time.

Bye.

2012

This is not a prediction from Nostradamus.

If you read enough, you do know and will discover about the Mayan calender prediction of 2012. The Mayan prediction was made thousands of years ago. The forecast is based primarily on what is claimed to be the end-date of the Mesoamerican Long Count calendar, which is presented as lasting 5,125 years and as terminating on December 21 or 23, 2012*. It is believed that something big will happen to the earth and will change the world order entirely. This particular Mayan prediction has drawn to many conclusions by the people. Some say it is the End of the World, Doomsday, the Apocalypse, some say it is just a date. There is even a movie 2012 due this year. Watched the trailer. That movie predicted 2012 is the End of The World. The scene is just so frightening. The earth splits, the ground merges, water and earth meets together, the mother let go of the child to save herself.

If you pay attention in kelas agama, it sounded so familiar, right?

NO. I'm not believing in prediction of 2012.

But I do believe there is an end to the world, but only He knows when.

I'm not writing about "Kiamat". It scares me everytime even when I heard of the word. I'm writing about 2012.

(from the internet- ABC news)

Two years ago, Patrick Geryl, then 51, quit his job as a laboratory worker for a French oil company. He'd saved up just enough money to last him until December 2012. After that, he thought, he wouldn't need it anyway.He started gathering materials necessary to survive — water purifiers, wheelbarrows (with spare tires), dust masks and vegetable seeds. His list of survival goods runs 11 pages long.

Save it because we are in the Asian society, and that is why we are not so drawn into and familiar with the 2012 prophecy. Let alone the Mayan civilization. The Mayan Prophecy is gaining strength and appears to be worrying people in all areas of society, especially in the Western part of the world. Some part of the world are even starting building underground tunnels, saving stocks of food. Thousands of people worldwide seem to be preparing, in one way or another, for the end of days in 2012. Survival groups exist in Europe, Canada and the United States.

This is what the Mayan prophecy believes:

First, a polar reversal will cause the north to become the south and the sun to rise in the west. Shattering earthquakes, massive tidal waves and simultaneous volcanic eruptions will follow. Nuclear reactors will melt, buildings will crumble, and a cloud of volcanic dust will block out the sun for 40 years.

It sounded exactly like what "Kiamat" is pictured in the Qur'an

______________________________________________

blank

blank

blank.

I don't know what to write anymore.

" Ask thee the people about the Hour (of Judgment). Say thou: ‘The knowledge of it is only with God." (The Koran - Al-Ahzab, 63).

"... But about the exact date and hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard; keep wide awake and pray; for you do not know the time." (The Bible- Mark 13:30-33)

The bf: Tahu tak kenapa diorang predict 2012 n tak 2011?

Me: kenapa?

The bf : sebab 2011 is Rugby World Cup.

Me: (raised eyebrows)

_________________________________________________________________________

p/s: The survival group. Aren't they suppose to be praying than making underground tunnels? It's like they're preparing for war.

sometimes I forget how it feels when I first fall in love

I didn't know the song Quelqu'un ma dit by Carla Bruni (the one I posted below) was in the 500 Days of Summer movie, until I heard it just now when I was watching it.

More reason to fall in love with the movie.

The movie.

It kinda draws a lot of feelings.

dear blogger list, bila nak update blog?

I read a blog of someone (Malaysian) that he had a one month visitor from New Zealand, and stayed with his family during his visit. He blogged about this Kiwi stays and how he loves the Malaysian food whatnot.

Before returning to New Zealand (Auckland precisely), the Kiwi guy (40 years old ++) gave some gifts to the boy.

It was,

Flight of the Conchords DVD and Bro Town DVD.

COOL!~ good choice pakcik!!!!!!!!!

Flight of the Conchords and Bro Town sums up New Zealand pretty well. I think I better get some of those for own souvenirs too.

______________________________________________________

p/s: I have problems with Asian with blond hair. Literally.

Quelqu'un m'a dit

Aku rasa otak aku akan hanya berfungsi pada tahap maksima hanya pada dua keadaan. Satu, atas katil, on the way lelap mata, atau dalam toilet. Sebelum terlelap, masa itu lah, macam2 idea, muka-muka orang, dan thoughts timbul. Aku terfikir apa aku nak buat esok, apa aku dah buat siang tadi, kadang2 thoughts that has been lost forgotten, ummi ayah, kawan-kawan, random thoughts. Dalam toilet jugak sama. Terutama ketika shampoo rambut in long showers.

I think it kinda reveals the hidden feelings, thoughts, that my mind often forgets to go into.

For what I know is that these are the results of the subconscious mind. Aku pernah baca sebuah buku 3 tahun lalu yang sepenuhnya about the power of subconscious mind, tapi satu ayat je yang aku ingat dari buku tu. "It is thinking without thinking". Pemikiran kita waktu tu ada kaitan dengan brain waves that we are at , at that time. It is whether in the Alpha, Beta, or Delta state.

Cerita lain.

Carla Bruni Sarkozy is the current 1st lady of France. Married to the current French President Nicolas Sarkozy on February 2008. I think she is beautiful, and near sophisticated look as Lady Diana. She was a former model, musician, and an heiress from an Italian musician elite family.

I love this song of hers. Quelqu'un m'a dit means "someone told me".

It is just perfect. I like the lyrics as well.

Sekarang sila bayangkan Rosmah main gitar dan menyanyi.

(0_o)

__________________________________________

Quelqu'un m'a dit (translation) - Someone told me

I’m told that our lives aren’t worth much,
They pass like an instant, like wilting roses.
I’m told that time slipping by is a bastard
Making its coat of our sorrows.
Yet someone told me…

That you still loved me
Someone told me…
That you still loved me.
Well ? Could that be possible?

I’m told that fate makes fun of us,
That it gives us nothing and promises everything,
When happiness seems to be within our reach,
We reach out and find ourselves like fools.
Yet someone told me…

That you still loved me
Someone told me…
That you still loved me.
Well ? Could that be possible?

Well ? Could that be possible?

So who said that you still loved me?
I don’t remember any more, it was late at night,
I can still hear the voice, but I can no longer see the face,
“He loves you, it’s secret, don’t tell him I told you.”
You see, someone told me

That you still loved me
Did someone really tell me?
That you still loved me
Well, could that be possible?

I’m told that our lives aren’t worth much,
Passing in an instant, like wilting roses,
I’m told that time slipping by is a bastard,
Making its coat of our sadnesses.

That you still loved me
Someone told me…
That you still loved me.
Well ? Could that be possible?

pause. please

Everybody around me is growing up. I noticed.

It is scary.

I don't want to. More and more seniors of mine are getting married. Also Allie, not to mention.

More and more people around me getting engaged.

Can you not feel the pressure?

Deymn.

I don't wanna grow up.

Please. So fast so fast.

No. no. no. no. no.

That's exactly why I don't want to drive the car.

and want my parents to send me everywhere.

Vanity check

She writes with her left hand.

The only in the family with curly hair.

I said to her "Adik anak angkat sebenarnya, sebab tu adik lain."

n then she cried. then she asked Ummi.

Happy 11th birthday, busuk.

Bye

I am way over with Auckland. I'm excited to see what's in for the next chapter.

Can't wait to be back in Malaysia as well.

but leaving behind the bf is not what I wished for.

I got extremely more things to do in Malaysia.

If only I can bring Auckland's weather and the super fast Auckland internet to Malaysia.

Too bad.